Class Notes 8 June 2011

Notes on Qwriting

REMEMBER: post your in-class writing as a blog “post”, and be sure to include the page numbers of what you cite.

FOR your RESPONSES, post as a “page” and include the works cited at the bottom of the page—correct MLA. If you’re not sure, check the Purdue OWL.


“She Lived in a Story”

–a story within a story: hard to follow because of POV changes

–kept my attention

–many things to examine

–confusing to keep up with the flow

–different tactics and literary elements

–like a mindfuck; challenges readers

–interesting concept

–title caught my attention

–writer gives voice to character

–a different way of reading

–interesting to see self-aware characters who knew they were living in a creation

–variety of characters: different personalities

–narration: reminded me of film, characters “breaking the fourth wall”: when actors/characters speak to the audience directly, break the illusion

–reminded me of the game “The Sims” because the author controls

–don’t think about the character being controlled, we just think of the character itself, unless a self-narration

–had to read some lines more than once

–follow Segovia’s train of thought, his zoning out: how he came up with the idea while driving

–like how Segovia’s architecture metaphors

–didn’t like, or was confused about was whether where the characters were real: too philosophical

–took a different direction than I thought

–could have been executed better: used the same names a couple of times for different characters; readers shouldn’t have to struggle with following the concepts (or the author will lose them—doesn’t he know that?)

–simpler stories are less challenging, could have been intricate, but not as garbled, could have been straightforward but still inctricate

–the mood and tone (eeriness pushed readers away); would have been more interesting if more action; or if more positive

–title of the story could have been different, the “she” doesn’t happen until the end: makes readers focus on the “she” even if “she” isn’t the main character

–if it was longer than a short story, readers would not have the patience

–if a short story, we can break it down; if not reading in class, I would have stopped reading it


 Group work: searching for critical terms and definitions

Steps to PIE:

  1. Define critical term
  2. Find passage in aesthetic text that illustrates the critical term
  3. Explain the connection you make—to help your audience who may not know the critical term. Make sure you reference what you cited from the aesthetic text



Point: focalization: definition: who sees or the relation of seeing and being seen (4-6 sentences); you have to give the term, and the definition


Here’s what you quote from the story/novel

“Eye-network, eye-space, large eye coming toward her, growing eye” (Samperio 59).

Explanation: This quote illustrates the idea of focalization because it emphasizes the function of the eye to see . . . . the repetition of the word eye clues the audience into the importance of sight and narration within the story. MUST BE THE LONGEST PART OF THE PARAGRAPH

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